rambling is important...

i miss rambling... i didn't ramble for a long time... at least not here... you should hear me ramble when i start getting into it... just for no reason... no need... no starting... no end... just pure uninterupted streams of concious and unconcious...

but so is story telling...

i once walked to a place hidden in a circular street made of apples... as i walked, the apples started to ripen, they started to rott, they began to smell, i continued to walk... the further aroudn the circle i walked, the more they rotted, the smell started to disapate as the rotting apples turned to dirt. The circle had warped into an oval type shape, and the hidden place i had seen initially had become quite evidant... The apples were gone... long gone... but up from the road started to grow a tree... i took the tree by the trunk. the tree was short and new, so i pulled it from the ground. I moved it off the street and onto the ground in the center. here i planted it again, and it began to grow while still in my hands... i stepped back, and walked aroudn the circle backwards, the tree started to ungrow... as it shrank back to a seedling. i turned and ran from the seedling, ran all the way aroun the oval, and when i got back to where the seedling had been, i found a tree, with a trunk 1 foot across on the tree there sprouted apples, new apples, which as i stepped closer promptly fell to the ground, and began to rott as i grew closer and closer.

i ran the track again, this time returning to a tree with a trunk almost 2 feet across, and next to it there was a stable, a stable filled with horses. as i walked closer, the outer sides of the street became lined with seets, then with bleechers. The horses raced, people bet their life's savings on single races, their dreams shattered or given new hope all within seconds. As i walked closer and closer to the stands, the seasons changed, the years went by. I watched a decade go by as i walked the track, the whole time, no one looked at me, it was as if it was a dream, but the whole time i knew it wasn't. I knew that i was there.

From my pocket i drew an apple, took a bite, and found myself laying in the grass to the side of the apple covered road... i went home, writing down my experience so i wouldn't forget it... I was 4 years old, last year, 20 years later, i walked back to the apple covered street, and next to it i found a tree, and a stable. I left, returning home without turning back. I returned again, the next year - this year - as i returned to the apple covered road, i found bleechers with a grand opening sign above them. I laughed, i smiled, i knew the outcome of every race for the next 10 years... they were engrained in my memory... i walked home laughing, later buyng a house far away from the apple covered street, getting as far away from it as possible, because the last thing i saw there when i was 4, was a leprichaun who's left hand clasped a butcher's knife, while his right hand held the head of someone i didn't know, at the time. Now though, as i looked in the mirror, the face on the head he held was mine. i packed and never came back. Damn leprichauns...

OH! on a happy note... (and an angry note) [see if you can tell the difference...]

i formatted AGAIN!!! today... i'd partitioned my hard drive in a bunch of places so as to have win98se and win2k running on seperate drives but partially sharing resource drives. anyway... win98se went on nicely, had 600 - 700 mb free on the drive afterwords (it's a very small partition) then i installed win2k, assuming it'd be similar, but it used up almost everything. There was 200 mb left at the end, and i use win2k (i dont' actually use win98se, i just have it running so i can do a more complete cleanup of my drive when i want to) anyway... point is that i formatted again today... got win2k put on, and decided that win98 is just not worth my time this time around. Although i can already feel my wrath starting to form at such an unpopular decision. (unpopular with myself... yes... popularity amoungst yourself is important... have you ever taken a popularity pole on yourself? have you ever done it inside your own head? have you ever eaten lightbulbs and talked about the taste of tongston on your tongue? how about lmao - ok - i'm rambling and i can't spell... lmao) do you feel the sanity? if you're looking for it, i'm afraid you're a little late... It's just left, and i'm not too sure about when it's coming back...

no spell check... again... what can i say... i don't like spell check... lmao...

anyway - this is just a ramble of thoughts, i don't really know why i wrote it - but, yeah... if you're religious, you may not like to read... if you're not... you may like to read.. if you don't like to read in general, this may not be for you... :P lmao

The universe...
For thousands of years the universe has been a static environment. The concept of a never changing universe was comforting to many in the past. The thought of the universe as a constant shape and size is a little rediculous when you think about it, as ourselves moving on Earth is a slight change in the universal pattern, and by taking a step left, right, forward or back, we have esentially disproven the posibility of a static universe.

Throughout history, theories have been changed so as to not oppose common belief. For instance, the theory of gravity proved that the universe must be collapsing on itself. The idea of a static universe just wasn't possible anymore, so the laws of gravity were changed. Suddenly, gravity, at extreem distances acted as a repulsive force. This enabled the universe to hold itself in check. However, such an idea is lacking in that the complex web that would exist would be so sensitive to change that our movement on earth would alter the balance and send the universe into ether a giant explosion, assuming the distant gravitational force took dominance, or implosion, assuming the gravity known to most took hold.

Although this seems proposturous, there is some truth within it. Galaxy's seem to be moving further and further apart. Not only are they becoming more distant, but as they spread, their pace increases and the run faster and faster away. It would seem as if the universe is trying to gain freedom for all it's parts.

As the universe continues to spread, our chances of exploration of distant planets deminish. As the travel time to any of these planets becomes longer and longer. Also, if we make it to set planet, the ride home will not only seem longer, but be significanly longer. However, knowing that all things can not be going in oposite directions is a bonus here. As that would limit the number of directions to 360^3 assuming 1 direction per degree, however lets make it a little more actuate and put in 100 directions per degree, and we're still set with 36,000^3 being 46,656,000,000,000 directions. Now, this is a huge number, and it's not really all that unbelivable to think that if there is a limit that would be about it. But, it would also mean that we're standing still. Which would put us at the center of the universe. Now, if the universe is infinant in size, then that is at least partially true, as any spot can be the exact center of infinity. However, our being the center of the universe is just as actuate as to say that a plannet 100,000 light years away is the center. Better yet, it would be accurate to say that the planet 100,000 light years away, and ourselves, are the center of the universe.

Now, what's the problem? Well we would need to be the exact center of the universe to have everything flying away from us, other wise there should be things flying towards us. Other galaxies and planets should be on their way into us, or at least following us at the same pace we have. Thus meaning that not everything is getting further away from us. And yes, with an infinant universe we can say that we are the center, but so can anyone else in the universe, so since anyone from any spot in an infinant universe can say that they're the center, and the center is the only place that is "not" moving since everything is flying away from them, then nothing is moving and we have a static universe again. Which we don't.

So what's the answer then? ok, the distance between planets is not continually expanding. At least not the same way the scientists of today think that it is. We are not the center of the universe, so not everything can be flying away from us. In conclusion, scientists of today are still as stuck on self importance as we were hundreds and thousands of years ago. Although they deny it and comment about how rediculous it was, their theories still suggest such proposterous things.

Religion is a major factor in people's understanding of the universe, religion itself is something that none of them understand, and yet they try to pull so much out of it in order to justify their ignorance. Each religious follower seems to believe that all religion is false, the belief in such things is rediculous, and those who follow it are doomed to an eturnity in a 'hell' of some sort or another. Although 'these' people have the ability to see how flawed other religions are, they seem to lack the same common sence towards their own belief system. As obviously their's is correct, and all the proof is in whatever book they follow. Not seeming to comprehend that similar books exist for all religions, and most of them will tell you how accurate they are.

Ignorance becomes a strength to religious people, as it turns into blind faith. Although many very religious people are exceptionally intelligent, their only ignorance comes of trying to prove their own beliefs to others.

~ BLAH BLAH BLAH ~

ok - i got side tracked - don't remember what i was writing about to begin with and, well, you saw what happened. I'm just getting bored of writing at the moment, and, well, to be honest, i didn't really feel like writing on the next topic i had in mind...

night all...

- Kain